Monday, September 22, 2014
Banned Books Week is here. It is not about the books banned themselves, although they are worth reading just like any other book is because we should value the privilege and our right to do so. This week is about intellectual freedom more than it is about a particular book. Judith Krug pioneered BBW in 1982 with the goal "to teach the importance of our First Amendment rights and the power of literature, and to draw attention to the danger that exists when restraints are imposed on the availability of information in a free society.” and we all should stand by that whether you enjoy reading books or not.
Sunday, September 7, 2014
There are times when I walk past my list of goals, a list I did in the last few weeks that I posted in a place I could view everyday, and while I look at it I wonder about its significance. I wonder what that list would mean without the people I love and I know then and there that it would only be a piece of paper. It always serves to remind me to be content and happy with what I have and where I am. I still strive for my goals but I always need to remember what success means to me. I am currently reading a book titled A Better Way To Live: Og Mandino's Own Personal Story of Success Featuring 17 Rules to Live By from the author Og Mandino and in it I read something that resonated with me, it said as follows: "And even if you have failed at all else in the eyes of the world, if you have a loving family, you are a success". How true I find this, how very true.
I recently had a dream, in it I had moved from my small house to a dilapidated house in the state of Georgia, through out the dream all I did was cry for everything I had left behind; I wanted my old house back regardless of its defects, I wanted my love, and my family back. In the dream I understood how much I should value what I have, my only source of happiness in my dream was that I had my son with me but yet we missed so much, even though in my waking hours I don't value what I have as I should value it. I remember the dream so vividly because it touched a soft spot in me.
I end with this note: We all need to remember that in this life where we are is sometimes exactly where we need to be.
Thursday, September 4, 2014
God is Good. Through everything and anything I can not forget and refuse to forget where all good comes from. While walking sometime this week without no prompt on my part and out of the blue my son says "God is Good" and all I could do was repeat it as a sweet mantra that soothes and comforts always.
I sat at the edge of my bed browsing on my cellphone, the inability to sleep just a habit now days, until something caught my attention. I sat there in silence looking at the bright screen, reading the quote over and over again; “Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big, worthwhile things. It isn’t the mountain ahead that wears you out – it’s the grain of sand in your shoe.” —Robert Service. As I sat on my bed reading this quote another quote instantly popped up in my mind; "Any idiot can face a crisis - it's day to day living that wears you out" - Anton Chekhov.
I sat in silence contemplating these quotes. It wasn't a revelation, I know what my struggles are and most of the time I can articulate exactly what they are but yet there I was grasping the concept and implications of what I had just read.
I have been battling with that grain of sand in my shoe for many years. As time has passed by I rarely notice it but it is there nonetheless, not allowing me to step comfortably in any direction. It keeps me too cautious, too immobile, and too afraid to go on because of the pain it may inflict. I over-analyze every step, treading carefully on the path that I am taking. I instinctively store a map in my mind of the path that was easiest to walk on and walk on it again and again.
As I woke up today with my well thought out plan of how my day was going to go, my to-do list at the ready, and my calendar stating the events of the day chirping away on my cell phone, I reached out to my ingrained path that is stored in my memory when I was struck out of balance when the first thing didn't go as planned. Calmly I calculated the best route to take, I made the necessary phone calls and re-arranged my plans. Deep inside me I could feel my annoyances rising up and in my shoe I felt the grain of sand, always there, always bothering me. Even now as I sit down writing this I can feel it, one step - grain of sand, two steps - grain of sand. It hasn't budged and it might take months or years for me to finally remove it, I might have gotten used to it so much by then that even after it is removed the feeling of having it will remain. It is a constant battle but yet today it is a battle I won, with a grain of sand in my shoe I walked another path and I keep pushing forward and that for me is a victory.
The Joy of Reading : )
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